Breathing

(If you haven't yet, you might find the post directly previous a good preface)

"Breathing" by Yellowcard

Feel free to listen to the song as you read: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GCNnnZ84UB8

This song is in a playlist entitled "Inspirational" in my iTunes. I'm not sure exactly why it's in that playlist other than that it is fast, loud, and I can totally rock out to it. I had always heard of Yellowcard, but I never really listened to them. Are they Christian or not? I knew a lot of my Christian friends listened to them, but I never knew. I still don't know. I have my assumptions... 

When I listen to this song I have a very clear and very strong memory come to mind. I had heard this song on the radio once or twice, but I was surprised when I heard it coming through the speakers of the van that Parable drove during the summer of 2007. I think it was on Lacey's iPod. We were just coming back from spending the day driving out to a very beautiful part of Oregon's coast (I forget what beach it was exactly), but it was where I took this picture:

Throughout the summer we had a number of songs that we dubbed as "ours." This was not one of those songs. But I do believe we resorted back to this song on a number of occasions whenever we needed to blast the speakers and just get lost in the noise for a while (or not have to hear each other's voices for a while ;)

I loved that summer. Sure, every now and then we all got tired of one another (and still to this day my blood-pressure shoots up whenever I hear the words "Mickey Mouse," but that is a story for another time). But, I have no idea what my life would look like right now without that summer and those friendships in my life. I gained some of my most important friendships from that summer. Honestly, without that summer, without those experiences, and without those friendships, my life would be so completely different than it is right now.

I thank God for that summer. I thank God for those friends. I am certain that I never would have had an equal opportunity, space, or time to form the friendships that I did with Lacey, Hannah, and Joe (don't worry Dax, you were already on that list). We became close - as friends, as spiritual pilgrims. Together, we learned a lot of lessons; and we asked a lot of questions. It was during that summer and because of our conversations that I began asking the kind of questions I did - questions about God, about salvation, about my call, about being a pastor. That summer was a turning point in my life. My faith finally began to feel like my own - it finally began to feel real, something truly living and moving.

I cannot express enough my eternal thanks for those friends of mine. Surely, for the rest of my life I will cherish my relationships with Dax, Hannah, Lacey, and Joe. You four are four of my closest friends. I love you. More than I can express... more than I can even comprehend. I love you. It is not a thought, but a feeling inside me, a feeling that surpasses even my own understanding. My life has been shaped by your influence in my life. And I am eternally grateful. Wherever you may be today, I wish you well, and I pray that you are daily seeing God teach you and lead you in directions you have never expected.

And I extend that prayer to all of my friends that have been equally influential, but, because NNU would not allow a group of 30 to travel, were not a part of that summer.

Honestly, without exaggeration, I thank God with the sweetest of prayers for all of my close friends and the influence which you have had on my life. I love you all.

Thank you for listening,

Seth

P.S. That was also the summer in which Lacey broke a hotel window trying to scare us. 

This broken window, in fact ; )

A Playlist for Life

I've known for some time that I have a tendency toward nostalgia, and this feeling is made even stronger in my current position - graduated, surrounded by new friends, far from old friends, physically distant from my fiance, and beginning a whole new phase of my life. I am surrounded by uncertainty, and I have not the stability of a school calendar to keep my worries locked to a regimented schedule. Thus, it is easier for me to look back than to look forward.

Don't get me wrong, I am excited for what is to come. I know that graduate school is just around the corner for me. And next summer I will be getting married! (I know. For some of you this is news. I promise, I'll cover this very soon : ) I have a lot to be excited about. But it is not easy, not for any of us, to move forward, away from the past and on to something new. With time, memories fade and the good times become the good 'old' times. And we have the opportunity, with every step we take, to make the time we do have meaningful, beautiful, and good. But it's not easy to move forward when it is just as difficult to recognize your own life as it is to time travel (which, by the way, I've been working on...if anyone's interested).

Nonetheless, I find great solace in memories. The future is going to come, that much is for sure. Though worries, struggles, and difficulty may come tomorrow, it is nice to be able to sit back for a few minutes and relish the memories of friends, of laughs, bonfires, birthday parties, ice-skating, TWIXes, and pelting half-naked freshman with snowballs on the first day of snow.

And oddly enough, I have found that one of the strongest memory-triggers I have is music. Not to mention, I have always thought it would be the BEST thing in the world if my life could have its own playlist or musical score! (I think that would make things so much more interesting). Anyway, it seems I have had at least one song, album, or band that has gotten me through or marked just about every different phase of my life. So, after such a belabored explanation, I want to share with you the songs, albums, and bands that not only get me through the time that I am in right now, but also remind me of the good and the bad in my past. And I'm sure that as I write, the details of my current thoughts and happenings will come out, keeping a balance to this blog, so that we don't all get too caught up in the past.

Well. This has been one very long and rambling post. So I'll stop now and very shortly I will add the first song in my life's "playlist."

Thanks for listening,

Seth